Tuesday, November 5, 2013


A couple of conversations with Adam today that I do not want to forget:

This morning we were reading a book about going to the pool.  He said "I'm sad".  I said "I'm sorry buddy, why are you sad?"  He replied "I'm sad because I want to go swimming with Granmommy."  Sweet boy!

Also, we normally give Adam one M&M when he pees in the potty and two when he poops (my apologies for the bathroom talk).  This morning he went peepee and poopoo at the same time, I gave him two treats and he immediately corrected me, "No Mommy, I went peepee and poopoo, I get THREE treats!"  I of course told him he was absolutely correct, that was simple addition and I didn't know how I could be so silly.  Moral of the story...DO NOT try to short Adam B. Goins an M&M!

This kid is absolutely killing me lately, I love this almost 3 age!  Some days I wish he was a twin so I could have two of him, I definitely DID NOT wish that a year ago!

Monday, October 7, 2013


And so it goes that I did not keep up the blog while Ben was in Germany.  As it turned out, we were able to skype more than I expected, and the need I felt for unloading my thoughts at the end of the day was overridden by my need for a bed and sleep.  But I was drawn back here tonight because I wanted to record exactly what I'm thinking right now, so I can remember.

Today was a unsuccessful day if you measure it by any barometer I normally use.  The dishwasher never got unloaded, that load of laundry is still in the washing machine, and the living room is littered with toys.  I never cooked an actual meal but just assembled food from different pantry and fridge items.  After my shower a very grumpy Adam woke up early from his nap and so my hair air dried without any brushing and I swept it into a messy ponytail.  I'm wearing running shorts and no makeup.

But today, oh today.

It was a rare 78 degree day in South Mississippi.  The sky was that deep alluring blue that belongs only to the month of October and the sun was bright and casting lovely shadows everywhere.  On such a day there was nowhere to go but out, and so out we went.  What choice did we have?  I have no idea how we passed an entire afternoon so quickly. We rode bikes, bounced the baby, gathered rocks, watched ants, and pulled weeds.  Adam is a master weed gatherer and if YOU try to place the weed in the blue bucket instead of handing it to HIM to do so, YOU WILL PAY.  At one point I glanced up to locate him for weed removal  and saw him running towards me, blue bucket hung on one arm, the wind blowing his blonde-brown hair, big eyes lit up and sparkling, and that famous, heart melting signature smile of his stretched across his face. He took my breath away.  I knew as long as I lived I would never forget how he looked in that moment.  Baby brother Will laughed and kicked from the porch, giggling those especially special very tickled giggles only his big brother can elicit from him, though the rest of us have tried in vain.

Think of what I would have missed if I'd stayed in to do laundry.

The evening culminated in a trip to the playground with Dad before he went in for the night shift.  We climbed on swings and swung so high we (almost) touched the stars.  Later when we came in Adam collapsed limp on the couch, his seemingly endless energy gone.  After bath I tucked his lavender scented body into bed, sang him his songs (he was too tired for books), and kissed him goodnight. As I paused at the door he called out "I wuv you Mommy".

This part of the post should contain perfectly Instagrammed and filtered photos of the afternoon, proof of the perfection of our day and my children.  But, just before we walked outside I went to get my phone...and left it.  I resolved not to worry about pictures that day, but instead to just be present in the lives of my children.  So those images will live in my memory, belonging only to my mother's heart.

And as far as my day being unsuccessful, well, it may be time for me to redefine success.  These boys are growing fast, and I can't afford to waste any more moments swapping living for laundry.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

To Ben in Germany #2


Today was the first full day without you here.  Only 30 more to go (I don't count September 1st since I'll see you that day, even if it's not until 9:30 at night).

And now for the family update portion of this blog post:

Will slept eleven (!!!) straight hours last night.



It felt like a "normal" night.  In bed at 7:30p up at 6:30a.  It was like we were actual human beings.  Of course I did not get the full benefit of a sleep-filled night since I didn't go to sleep until 2am because I watched that little plane make it's way across the Atlantic and land in Frankfurt. Then I was up for an hour with Adam after he fell out of his bed, but I least I wasn't feeding Will on top of that!

You looked so tired on Skype this morning, but it was great to see your face even for a little bit.  How cute was Adam's lullaby?  How could you not sleep great after such a serenade? I can't believe you were kept awake on the plane by a newborn on the same night your own newborn slept through the night back home.
Pretty funny, huh? Are you laughing?  No?

Today we tackled the inevitable.  Grocery shopping with two kids.  You're probably not going to be happy about this, but I did the shopping at Target instead of the Commissary.  I know, I know, taxes, higher prices, blah blah blah.  But I can explain!  I had things to get at Target anyway and so I only had to make one trip.  Plus it's Target!  The opportunity to grab myself a little happy off the shelf as a reward for taking the boys shopping was a necessary perk.  But the real reason is that they have these buggies:

Let me tell you something this thing was no joke.  It made the double stroller seem like a sports car.  And pushing it through the people and aisles...I just...I can't even talk about it.  But the important thing is we did it.  With two boys on the verge of naps.  Adam was getting fussy at the register and I couldn't find the cure. Goldfish?  No. Juice? No. iPhone? No. Spiderman sunglasses?  Yes!

Whatever works kid, whatever works.

The real adventure came on the ride home.  I rushed out of the store and loaded up the purchases and the children.  It was 30 minutes until Adam's nap time and Will's feeding time.  We were on the road & I was feeling pretty pleased with my superior mothering abilities when suddenly right next to my ear I hear:


I looked back and saw this:

Yes, that is our two year old NOT in his car seat.  Complete panic ensued.  In my rush to get the boys in the car I DID NOT BUCKLE ADAM IN.  I was already on 110 with no place to turn around.  I slowed down and prayed that I would not pass a cop, because if I did I was pretty sure I was going to jail for child endangerment.  I managed to pull off an exit and into a gas station.  As I went around the curve Adam yelled "Whoa!  This is fun!  Whoa!".

To be fair, I promised him a month full of adventures, and boy am I delivering.  Am I ever.

I quickly got Adam secured in his seat and we were back on the road.  Despite our little detour we still pulled in the garage with 8 minutes to spare before nap and nursing time thankyouverymuch.  But I mean, I couldn't give myself too big of a pat on the back, you know, because of the toddler roaming around the moving car situation.

After nap Adam woke up with a rash and I'm still panicking a bit about it.  OF COURSE these things happen when you're gone.  Thankfully I had a text consultation with Dr. Derek via Sarah's phone to make me feel better.  After an oatmeal bath, some cortisone, prayers, and an untouched supper he's back in bed. Will went down again at 7:30 without being rocked.  This isn't my first rodeo, so I don't expect it to be another perfect night.  But hey, wouldn't it be nice? A girl can dream.

Love you so much, I hope we can talk tomorrow on a somewhat clearer connection.  Miss you like crazy!

I remain Your obt svt,


Wednesday, July 31, 2013

To Ben in Germany

Oh Captain My Captain,

You left for Germany this morning.  I've actually been doing ok today.  I've thrown myself into projects around the house per usual, and fair warning, let's just say you're going to have to ask where a lot of things are when you get back.

Adam asked "Where's Daddy?" no less than 16 times at bedtime tonight, but I did manage to distract him by offering to let him pick out his jammies.  I presented his options to him only to have him shake his head at each one.  He kept saying something that sounded like "mushrooms".  I asked him to point at the ones he wanted, and he peeked in the drawer and said "I can't see them".  I then led him to our bedroom where the rest of the pajamas were folded but hadn't been put away yet.  I continued to go through pair after pair, but he kept shaking his head and repeating "monshers".

Finally  light bulb went off and I pulled out his monster pajamas.


"Yes!  Monshers!"

Duh Mom.

Holy Moly that kid amazes me.  Is he honestly old enough to remember his favorites and request them??

Will took a couple of long naps today, he'd only been up an hour when he started getting tired again at 7:30.  I rocked him a bit, but it was time for Adam to go to bed, so I laid Will down in his crib and turned the fishies on the ceiling for him to watch.  When I came back he was asleep.  Wahoo!  It reminded me so much of Adam's routine when he was a baby.  Are we really finally getting there?  Are we going to have a real, actual bedtime and is Mommy going to have a night?  If so, nice timing God, really nice timing.

As for me, I've been checking and rechecking your flight path.  I love seeing where you are.  Look, you're over the ocean right now!

Other scenes from the day...

Apparently the boppy still works well into the toddler years:
 Will is officially a thumb sucker.  This is the only proof he may actually be mine, it's the only Robinson gene that made it through.

And I just realized both pictures I took today are thumb sucking pictures of the boys.  Some may see future dental problems, I see self-soothers.

I hope your flight is going well and that you're helping that poor Army wife sitting in front of you with the 3 kids (newborn included! yikes!).

Love forever,